Hilarious 1: naughty students

-

THE teacher bet with is pupil in class if u ask me any question I fail u will be the monitor of the class. one PUPIL said me madam.

PUPIL!how do you put an elephant in the fridge!

TEACHER!!I don't know that one.

PUPIL!! U open the fridge and put it. then asked another one.how do u put a monkey in the fridge

TEACHER!smiled and said I know that one u open the fridge and put it In there

PUPIL!!NO you open the fridge take out the elephant and then u put the monkey inside Then he asked another question,all the animals went to the lion birthday party accept one animal. which one was it!

TEACHER!!the teacher was a bit confused and said the lion.

PUPIL!" NO" the monkey bcoz he still in the frdge.then he ask her just one question.if there is a river full of crocodiles without a bridge and you wanted to get across it how would you

TEACHER!!the teacher said u would find a boat and close

PUPIL! no u would swim across becouse all the crocodiles are at the lions birthday.

She just laugh and walk from the class without any word

Comments

Post a Comment

You Can Also Read

Body of Ebola victim cremated in Lagos

-
The body of the first victim of Ebola Virus Disease in Nigeria, who died in Lagos on Friday, has been cremated. Details of the cremation were not available at press time but Sunday Vanguard gathered that the event was witnessed by officials of the Lagos State Ministry of Health and the Nigeria Centre for Disease Control, NCDC, led by its Project Director, Professor Abdulsalam Nasidi, among others. The decision to cremate the body of the victim, it was further gathered, may not be unconnected with the deadly nature of the Ebola Virus which is known to be easily transmissible from human to human during handling of corpses of victims. The World Health Organisation recommends that in communities where there is an outbreak of Ebola, appropriate containment measures including burial of the dead should be properly handled. While stating that people who die from Ebola should be promptly and safely buried, WHO notes that cremation, which is the application of high temperature to reduce b...
Read more

Plane Blown Off Runway At Stornoway Airport

-
A plane carrying 28 people has been blown off the runway at Stornoway airport in the Isle of Lewis. The Loganair Saab 340 aircraft had been trying to take-off for Glasgow when its wheel collapsed in heavy winds and it veered off the runway. Two passengers were taken to hospital with minor injuries, according to the Scottish Ambulance Service. Stornoway Airport management issued a statement shortly after the incident saying: "Efforts to remove the aircraft from the runway are ongoing and investigations into the cause of the incident are under way. "It is it our intention to resume normal operations as soon as the aircraft is safely removed from the runway. "There are no scheduled arrivals or departures at Stornoway until later this afternoon." Meanwhile, a Blue Island Airways plane had to be diverted from London City Airport to Southend Airport in Essex this morning after an engine fire. The plane had been travelling from Jersey. The fire wa...
Read more

General dies of COVID-19 in Abuja

-
Image
The General Officer Commanding 6th Division, Port Harcourt, Rivers State, Maj-Gen. Johnson Olu Irefin has reportedly died of complications associated with the Coronavirus pandemic. The sudden death of Irefin, who assumed the command of the division in July 2020 replacing Maj.-Gen. Felix Agugo, was said to have thrown the army into mourning. Though the Army Public Relations Officer, Maj. Charles Ekeocha, kept mum over the development, a senior military officer from Abuja confirmed it describing his death as shocking. He said: “One of our fine officers is dead. He is the GOC 6th Division. He died in Abuja after developing complications caused by the coronavirus pandemic.” Prior to assuming the command of the 6 Division and Land Component Commander Operation Delta Safe, Port Harcourt Barracks, Irefin was the immediate-past GOC 81 Division Nigerian Army Lagos.
Read more

FUNAAB Management meets Muslim Students over hijab and Niqob (veil) crisis in the University

-
Image
The Management of the Federal University of Agriculture Abeokuta (FUNAAB) following  Intel Region’s report  concerning the ban of Niqob (veil) for all Muslims interested in studying or visiting the University environment. Intel Region had earlier reported that the Federal University of Agriculture, Abeokuta (FUNAAB) was the first public institution to pronounce a ban on a religious dressing, niqob (veil), considered as a fundamental human right by the Constitution of Nigeria. The announcement of the ban created an uproar from Muslim faithful and human right activists across the University, Nigeria and the world, citing that the University has no right to ban a fundamental human right and more also  should not compare Niqob with mini-skirt tagging them as lousy/immoral . In a meeting on Monday, between the University administration, the University Muslim Community and the Muslim Students of the University (MSSN-FUNAAB), the University Management headed by the University Vi...
Read more

FIFA withdraw eaglet skipper award

-
World football governing body FIFA have withdrawn bronze boot award from Golden Eaglets skipper Kelechi Nwakali at the recent U17 World Cup in Chile and re-awarded it to compatriot Samuel Chukwueze after a mistake In a letter to the NFF general secretary, Mohammed Sanusi, and signed by Mustapha Fahmy, director of the football division, FIFA admitted their blunder: “We made a mistake at the closing ceremony of the FIFA U-17 World Cup Chile 2015 with the distribution of the adidas Bronze Boot. Nwakali “Instead of player no. 8 of Nigeria, Samuel Chukwueze, the player Kelechi Nwakali (player no. 10 of Nigeria) received the adidas Bronze Boot. However, if two or more players are still equal (after goals and assists), the player who has played fewer number of minutes will be ranked first. “With this in mind, adidas will send you another Bronze Boot in December 2015, which we would kindly ask you to hand over to Samuel Chukwueze. Please be informed that Kelechi Nwakali ma...
Read more

Erythrocyte Sedimentation Rate (ESR) Test

-
Image
1. Objective The objective of the test was to measure the rate at which red blood cells settled at the bottom of a vertical tube over a specified period, helping to detect inflammation in the body. 2. Principle The test was based on the principle that red blood cells settle faster in the presence of increased plasma proteins, such as fibrinogen and immunoglobulins, which occur during inflammation. The distance the RBCs fell in a given time was measured and expressed in millimeters per hour (mm/hr). 3. Materials • Patient’s blood sample (mixed with anticoagulant) • Westergren or Wintrobe ESR tube • Anticoagulant (sodium citrate) • ESR stand • Timer • PPE (gloves, lab coat) 4. Procedure (Microscopic/Analytical) 1. Blood was collected by venipuncture and mixed with sodium citrate anticoagulant in a 4:1 ratio. 2. The mixture was drawn into a Westergren tube up to the zero mark. 3. The tube was placed vertically in an ESR stand. 4. The level of clear plasma at the top of the col...
Read more

HIV Test

-
Image
1. Objective : The objective of the HIV test was to detect antibodies, antigens, or nucleic acids of the Human Immunodeficiency Virus in order to diagnose HIV infection and monitor its stage. 2. Principle : The principle of HIV testing varied depending on the method: ELISA (Enzyme-Linked Immunosorbent Assay ): It was based on the antigen-antibody reaction where HIV antigens coated on a microplate captured patient antibodies (if present), and a color change indicated positivity. Rapid Test (ICT – Immunochromatographic Test ): It relied on antigen-antibody binding producing a visible colored line on a strip. Western Blot : It detected specific HIV proteins using patient antibodies as confirmation. PCR (Polymerase Chain Reaction ): It detected HIV RNA/DNA in blood, useful in early infection or newborns. 3. Materials : Patient’s serum or plasma sample HIV test kit (ELISA plate / Rapid strip / PCR reagents) Micropipettes and tips Buffer solution ELISA reader (for ELISA method) C...
Read more